hi
I know hvn updated VERYVERYVERY long....
eva since this yr, i've been more emo, i tink... I feel like more depressed& somhow more pathetic as well....
seriously, in my life, rite now e oni ying dat i'm happy bout is NewS & Keii..... If I don hv dem rite now, i'd prob b crying cauz i gotta go skul or study.... It's pathetic, YA!!! My happiness lies in the hands of 6 ppl who don know me, don know i exist & r miles&miles away...... But I don regret knowing NewS & more importantly Keii.....
But now, I'm super numb, I don know how & wat to feel anymore???!!? It's like i feel happy bout somtin but den i'll get sad tinkin bout e -ve side but den remind myself wy i like it in e 1st place den get happy again.... I'm confused & sometimez i feel like it'd b better if i culd juz stay a str face & not smile.... Go away to a mountain & juz, free myself....
I'm glad I hv my frens, I'm glad I love Keii, I'm glad I hv music to help me through my days..... I'm depressed how pathetic i live my life, feeling like i'm juz dreadin it 4 ppl who don even know or accept or assume me..... Sometimez I wana fall in2 a deep sleep & nvr wake up, not die, but juz long enough to e point wer i can find my peace & wen i do wake, i don feel as crap.....
I hate myself 4 being this, wateva this is
DePReSSeD